Vent | The Scribblings of Robs

vent

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22 Oct 2011

How about $40 Million for The World?

This isn’t new information, but the world is pear-shaped. And yes I’m about to have a vent about poverty and yes that picture is incredibly cliche, but I saw this blog post yesterday and I haven’t been able to kick the images out of my mind. We tend to screen out things that make us feel uncomfortable. Because once we’ve processed them, we can’t guiltlessly stick our heads in the sand and pretend it’s not happening.

I blame money. I blame us. Look at our skewed priorities. Just look to Wall Street, Greece and the turbulent bowl of economic soup that the EU is busy swimming around in.

I watched Julie and Julia the other day. Julia Child’s first advance on her book was $1500. This sum seemed astronomical to her and her husband in the late 50′s. 60 years later and I find myself going, $1500, is that all?? That’s nothing.

I partly blame this skewed perception on the tech industry and the exorbitant, over-inflated and ridiculous amounts they throw around. It grates me so much that the Colour app [which is completely useless] got $40 million. million. in funding. Babies are starving to death and a pointless, ineffective app is getting 40 million dollars.

I hate the high Gini coefficient, the staggering inequality and that while 1% of the world laps up the luxury, the other 99% struggle.I watch as the 99% blog about their student loans, their bond repayments and their minimum wage jobs. These are people who have computer access, internet connection and the opportunity for tertiary education.

Seriously. Give me a break. The 99% in the third world need fresh water, food and shelter. Who’s blogging for them? How is it possible that we live in a world where these situations coexist?

I get irritated with what we’ve created. It’s wrong and frustrating.

And here I am blogging about wanting $1000 shoes.

Hypocrite much?

*images sourced here, here and here
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10 Aug 2011

Dear London Rioters

* sourced via weheartit
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30 Jun 2011

Cars and Women

Oh Brands

Why do some of you engage in foetus-friendly speak when talking to women? Tell me. Is there a giant Moron sticker plastered across our foreheads that I can’t see?

So what prompted this? Well I’ve always felt that very few car manufacturers manage to market effectively to women, but the tipping point was yesterday when I was linked to a women’s car supplement online. *clickety click*

They give advice as well as quick, snapshot car reviews for the female market. I read a few of the reviews. I cringed at the ‘reviews’ I saw. It was sparkly fluff that provided little value. I couldn’t believe how they were speaking to their audience. In fact, I actually reached for my forehead to see if there was a Moron sticker I could peel off. It was like I was shopping for Darth Vader .. and they were selling me Hello Kitty.

And I showed other people. They cringed too. In fact no one thought this was a good idea. Granted I only showed 9 people. 6 of which were women. The women found it insulting and agreed this publication shouldn’t really be playing on the stereotype jungle-gym.

The guys just thought it was hysterical and then took cheap shots about female drivers.

Now. I feel qualified to talk about this because:

a) I’m a young, professional female

b) I recently bought a car

c) It’s my name on the URL

So lets wander down the road of logical thought together. Stick with me okay.
1. I’m checking out reviews because I want to buy a car.
2. I probably have a significant amount of disposable income.
3. Indications are good that if I have disposable income, I probably have a decent job.
4. To get this job… well. I probably needed some basic, intellectual capability. A matric at least. In fact there’s a good chance that most of us have some form of tertiary education. Be it diploma, certificate or degree.
5. It’s safe to say I have a decent IQ (i.e capable of stringing words together).
6. We can assume my interest in the purchase of an asset such as this, runs deeper than whether or not the car’s interior matches my favourite pair of stilettos.
7. In fact. Stilettos really shouldn’t even be discussed at this point because no matter how gorgeous they are (and I do love shoes) they have absolutely no valid relevance in the purchase decision of a 200k+ asset.
8. The market is changing. Female buying power is no longer just a nice idea or catchphrase, it’s actually happening. We’ve got good qualifications, great jobs, higher levels of disposable income and our wallets are starting to bear significant merit in those little, consumer pie-charts that brands so love.
9. So why exactly are you patronizing (albeit with pretty,glittery words) your audience?
Come on guys. Get a clue.

This whole thing didn’t strike me as very empowering on any level.

I will openly admit that I dont know a lot about cars, BUT this doesn’t make me an idiot. Plus I have met a lot of women who are fluent in car. I’ve even met some who have taught guys how to change tyres.

Yeah. I’ll just let that sink in.

Look I’m having a go… maybe my blood sugar is low.

But even regular-blood-sugar-levels Robs thinks it’s poor.
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24 Jun 2011

Dear PR Companies

If you’re going to invite yourself into my inbox, onto my phone and across my desktop then for the love of cheese and cream crackers just personalise the press release.

You’re emailing me because you want something right? Well use my name. Ask me how I am. Say thank you. You know, implement the things your mother taught you.

At least take the time to work out if I would ever in a million days be relevant to your brand and/or product.

You will see results. This is not rocket science.

Some of you get it right. Kudos. Applause. Hand claps all around. But lately most of you (trad. agencies… I’m looking at you here) have become glorified spambots…except with swankier email addresses and fewer promises of winning the Nigerian lotto. And you’re certainly not doing the brand who is picking up the bill ANY favours.

There’s no excuse. I have faith in you.. you’re not inept. You’re smarter than this.

It’s so obvious to me that it makes me want to poke holes through my eyeballs with a blunt spoon.

Try good manners and try understanding the medium you’re operating in.

Just try. I’ll even help you. Really.

Go on. I dare you.

Try something which is clearly obvious… yet unfortunately revolutionary.
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7 Jan 2011

Judging Judgementals?

You know. And don’t let the tiger fool you. I do say this with all the calm acceptance in the world.

Judgmental people really piss all over my parade.

Maybe I’m a hypocrite now… because technically I’m judging judgemental people.

Confusion.

So.

I’m standing in the bank. Queuing ( oh fun of funnest days). But while I was walking to the bank. I noticed this woman ahead of me. She was walking with a little girl; her daughter. She had bold dress sense, tarnished gold stilettos and she had a dragon tattooed across her shoulder blades.

And yes I’m guilty. I put her in a box. A box marked stripper. But. I didn’t think .Wow. She must clearly not be worthy of my time or basic decency.

She seemed cool. She stopped to say hi to the guys who sell papers and chat to the woman who sells wire flowers. She also greeted the man at the door. And she really did. I notice these things. Good idea to say hi. You may stumble across one of the best conversations of your life. Plus it’s just polite really. People aren’t pieces of furniture.

Anyway.

I watched people react to her in the bank. Two women in particular. Like she was something they’d scraped off their shoes. The looks. Smirks. Raised eyebrows. Trying to catch everyone’s eyes and persuade them to join in their little, impromptu jury box.

Blind. Blind and a bit moronical. ( See new word. Use new word. Love new word.)

They couldn’t see that there she was. Depositing money into her account, to cover her kids school supplies (she was, I listened). Providing for her kid. They failed to see that she was just a Mum. In a bank. With her little girl.

She got a call. She took it. Immediately both pairs of raised eyebrows started loudly asking EVERYONE if cellphones were allowed in banks.

For crying in a tiny bucket.

No really. Come on. This is Petty Personified.

The reason I scribbled this. Is because I like poetic justice.

Like Julia Roberts with those shop assistants in Pretty Women. You remember right?

This woman got the last laugh.

It turns out. One pair of eyebrows was there because her account had been frozen and she wanted to know why. And the teller quietly told her it was because she hadn’t paid her bank charges.

She stood in disbelief.

Made a huge scene.

People turned. She stormed out.

The peanut gallery in my head giggled.

Sorry if I just got up on my moral high horse with this.

I’ll get down now.

But yeah. Don’t judge. You’ll miss out.

Hula hoop instead.

*Images found with weheartit
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23 Nov 2010

Extras. Exposure. Exploitation.

I need to vent.

I’ve gotten three castings this week. Each one has ticked me off in some way or another. Almost all called for long hours and min money. I guess this one was just the trigger. So it’s not its fault.

A casting has been making the rounds on Facebook. It’s a music video for a well-known SA band.

looking for actors/extras
All ages
No pay

Which is fine.

In, fact you know what? It’s not fine. But that’s another story.

This casting didn’t, but these castings often tend to feed you a generic line. It really annoys me.

“Oh you’ll be in xyz’s music video. Everyone one will see you. Yay for you! How exciting!”

No. Realistically they won’t see you. They’ll see the featured peeps and the band… and maybe the back of your head.

And another thing ( This is aimed more at big-budget commercial jobs really).

Extras have the worst job on set.

I know. I did my time. And maybe I’m about to pull the diva card here, but hey maybe someone should?

As an extra I worked long hours, often got fed next to nothing, was expected to do ridiculous things ( once I had signed away their guilt on an identity form) and was once sexually harassed by some man who had been sexually harassing girls on set all day, that no one cared to do anything about.

And these are the professional extra agencies looking after you.

Extras are too often treated like dirt. In some cases I’ve watch them get paid R240 for 12 hours work. And to be honest. They’re kind of crucial to the movie/ad. Movies need people crossing the street or walking their dog or getting out of the lift. It makes the movie.

When did you last see a movie without extras? Oh that’s right. You didn’t.

Cut the extra some slack??!?!?! And while you’re at it, pay them better rates!

Fck it.

I’m just tired of all the exploitation in the industry. No wonder everyone clings on for season when the international production teams fly out. And then we (agencies, freelancers, production houses) let them walk all over us and sometimes even watch them cut down our rates to the bare minimum. If we even get paid. Cough, Cough Bollywood.

Plus this working for exposure is nonsense. When did you last pay a bill with exposure? Huh? People die of exposure! ( thanks @rudi_cronje).

Promo companies, you’re becoming guilty of this too!

You’re feeding your girls this ‘exposure’ line in the hopes that they’ll do the job for R35 an hour, smile and be chirpy about it.

Them: “Oh the money’s not great but the exposure you’ll get will be fantastic! Trust me”

At a corporate golf day? Are you freaking kidding me?

Eventually that ‘exposure’ line is going to wear incredibly thin.

And I know. It’s not only the talent that suffer. I know the smaller production companies are expected to accomplish everything on a budget the size of half a pea. I know it’s difficult to shoot something for next to nothing and still do a good job. I am wise enough to know that some exploitation has to go down.

BUT

I’m fed up on other peoples behalf. It’s just total god damn crap. It needs to change. I know that’s not very eloquent, but there you go.

Disclaimer: I know I’m generalising here. I’ve had wonderful experiences on set with local, indie companies and international projects as both an extra and an actress. Both paid and unpaid. I’ll gladly work for ‘exposure’, just don’t BS me about it. I guess that a few castings just hit a nerve this week.

As did this ‘casting’.Don’t get me started on this guy. Basically poor rates mean girls are actually entertaining this type of brief.

Which freaks me out.

Ok vent over. Feel better.

Mental hugs and hot chocolate for everyone
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